Walk Like a #Cisman

I did some research on the next sign in Chinese astrology. We’re leaving year of the horse for the year of the sheep – the wooden sheep apparently – the system is too complex to explain here – google will take you there.


Hmmm … year of the sheep – doesn’t sound very butch does it? Seems I’m not the only who thinks that it is year of the ram. I know a ram is a male sheep – but why isn’t it the year of the ewe? How did the gender get decided upon? Gemini – are both twins male? Leo is always a male lion, never a lioness.

For Year of the Horse I came across lots of striking pictures of stallions but none of mares tending colts. That this is the Year of the Ram in the Americanized rendering of Asian systems doesn’t come as a real shock though. Even Post Canada is honouring the Ram.


This is how unobtrusive oppression can be. Do I sound melodramatic? Pedantic? This sort of gender bias makes it so clear to me the things women have to face in such a subtle consistent way. This is how language reinforces roles & stereotypes.


In my own writing about queer life I stopped referring to men as boys, unless I was writing childhood recollections. It wasn’t a big adjustment for me but when I question straight male writers on the use of ‘girl’ as opposed to ‘woman’ they act as if I’m being picky. Sorry but that’s how it is – when a guy writes how much his ‘girl’ turns him on I get a little queasy – not because hetero sex bothers me but sex with children does.


Walk Like a Cisman

don’t waste your time

trying to shame me

with these sociological divisions

the fact that I’m not sexually interested in

is one of those things about me

that I can live with

it’s not meant to marginalize

oppress or judge you or anyone

there’s enough shame to go around

without your need to assign blame and fault

adding to the confusion

to the endlessly split hairs of gender sexuality

body image   agism

I thought it was enough

to define myself as gay male

but it seems that isn’t clearly defined enough

there’s a new gender code


for male born male

who identify as male

to keep the playing filed transparent

I’m a cismale

who finds cismen who like cismen


my mind isn’t closed to those

outside that general description

but I am not looking there

which makes me into oppressor

just for being me

it’s bad enough I’m one

of those racist assholes

who finds asian man hot

who likes black guys

desi suits me fine too

oh white guys are equally welcome

a bit of body hair is nice

shaved really doesn’t work for me

showered is best

there’s my narrow platform

my limited erotic map

says who?

cis me


Like my pictures? I post lots on Tumblr


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