I met this guy online – he sent a wave to me on Bear411 – a site that skews older, more experienced, hairy & less toned. His pics are okay – the usual not so clear face pic & the ultra clear dick pic. Both are fine. I replied & then didn’t hear back for a month or so when he messaged me again about why I never text with him. I send him my email address. I don’t hear again for another couple of months.
I’m a good responder but not one to persistently follow up if I don’t get a reply to my reply to their reply etc. If opportunity knows but doesn’t come in when the door is opened its not opportunity after all. Some guys are like that, they want attention not action.
Then he posts me again at 411. I give him my cell# – persistence counts for something with me. He is a text-a-holic. I get like twenty within a ten minute – so fast he loses track of what I am replying to. My flip-phone isn’t built for texting so I am slow & keep my texting to two or three word responses. If it calls for more than that you better be patient.
He lives deep west end Toronto – Jane area. I’m east end, Donlands area. Meeting seems unlikely. One afternoon last week I get a text, he’s on bike & in my neighbourhood. Well, if a guy will ride his bike that far, I’m ready to meet him f2f for sure. We go to a local coffee shop. He’s presentable enough in the flesh. He talks about what he wants to do sexually. He’s a late 40’s, single, bi-curious. No one in his life knows this ‘side’ of him. I make it clear what I’m into & that I’m only interested in FWB, nothing more emotionally involved than that (to start with anyway).I send him on his way. His texts as he rides him bike. Turns out he has some sort of talk-to-text tech. Cool. We meet again a few days later to take things to the naked level.
Before we start I ask about why he’s exploring his ‘bi’ inclinations. He hasn’t had sex with men other than a late-teens blow job from a guy. He says its because he’s a bored. I don’t ask why he’s bored – too much information. I initiate some making out, he responds with groping. We get naked, stretch out on the bed & I encourage him to explore a bit, do with me what he thinks he may enjoy.
It becomes clear he’s not into it at all. Not out of shyness or nervousness. I’m not out to teach anyone life lessons at these level, but sex is rarely the solution for boredom, just a diversion. He wasn’t diverted enough to keep me interested. I’m not even disappointed, it would have been fine fun if it had worked out but it didn’t. Another opportunity to see that opportunity is enough.
he’s your boyfriend?
he never mentioned anyone else
yes I see how this is upsetting you
it’s not as if I picked him up
oh is that what he said
what was I thinking?
I was thinking it would be a good time
nsa as they say
no strings attached
he said he had no strings on him
plus it wasn’t strings that were pulled
sorry didn’t mean to take you so lightly
all men are horn dogs
if you think otherwise
you are in for more than one rude awakening
I don’t see why you are
all surprised and hurt
or is it the fact that he was sleeping
with a guy
that’s got you so upset
look I told you
I didn’t know that he was engaged
that you have two kids already
I didn’t set out to steal your man
if that’s what you are thinking
he was just some sort of cute guy
I ran into at a Tim Horton’s
simple as that
I was looking at the funny papers
and he sat down to look at them too
one thing lead to another and another
we didn’t get into history just into bed
and if you want to know the truth
if he was getting what needed from you
maybe he wouldn’t have bothered with me
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