On Disability After Dark Andrew Gurza frequently talks about his dislike of inspiration porn – look how well this disabled person does. So when I say AG inspires me this is not what I am talking about. His candour about his life, fears, frustrations have pushed me to look at my little gay life & discussion those issues too. I may never reach the levels of vulnerability Andrew has but I’m not afraid of going there, either.
I should also make a disclaimer here – I am not disabled – I have never really met Andrew either, so we have not had sex. I state this because some people have assumed those things. Not that I mind those assumptions but I don’t want readers to think I’m being dishonest when I respond to the issues he talks about.
His podcast brings a vulnerability to being queer that is at times disarming while at the same time has encouraged me to become more vulnerable about my own fears & frailties. Not that I’ve ever been that hidden but at the same felt that talking about my sense of body issues, about agism – would be seen as some grumpy old gay queer bitching about being a grumpy old gay queer. I decided that was probably better than being seen as another boring old fart.
He explores issues of message, of how to convey that message in ways that serve change. He’s done sets of quite hot nudes. He’s not been afraid to make – no, not make – but demand, a place for his hot cripbod. Should I # that: #hotcripbod ? As a result I’ve pushed myself to create a greater visibility for the ordinary Joe body with my #DadBodHot postings on tumblr – me in my undies grinning at a mirror. You can blame Andrew for giving me the motivation to be even more out there than I am.
#this
#mylifematters
I was going to go with
#thislifematters
but #this was too impersonal
too ambiguous
it wasn’t the fact of life that matters
but that my life in particular matters
what am I trying to do
co-opt a bigger more important movement
coattail on the buzz
it has built
capitalize on their suffering & hard work
just to gain some pitiful attention
am I hoping to create controversy
with this spin
on an already over spun trend
with some snide spin of my own
because I think #myspinmatters
when its clear that it doesn’t
mean shit to a tree
I’m just another privileged guy
whose life
whose opinion
doesn’t matter
who doesn’t have a hope in hell
of stirring up anything
outside of his own little pond
so I guess
until I have something profound to say
and the money to back it up
#mylifedoesn’tmatter
Chapbooks available: http://wp.me/P1RtxU-2f6
on going 🙂 when new podcast are posted: Disability after Dark iTunes
June 9-10: attending: Capturing Fire 2017 – flight & hotel booked already
check out these poets from Capturing Fire 2015 & 2016
August 31-Sept.3 – I have my ticket already
https://www.facebook.com/events/526940540845331/
November 1 – 30 Participating NaNoWriMo
Hey! Now you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee in Washington – sweet,eh? paypal.me/TOpoet
Like my pictures? I post lots on Tumblr
