On a recent Disability After Dark podcast Andrew Gurza talks about his pursuit of hot pictures of himself. In an online world in which photos have become the lure for everything from ebook sales to dating getting that right shot is crucial. There are sites devoted to teaching you, for a modest fee, how to create an ebook cover that will make your book a best seller. With people judging a book cover by a thumb nail pic that cover better have enough eye appeal to get them to click for more.
I see many profiles on dating sites that say ‘no pic no response.’ Many, myself included, won’t click on a profile if there isn’t a picture. You can’t even register on some sites without a photo. So that photo lure has to have more than eye appeal. For me – it should also be in focus, with decent lighting. It should be of the one posting the profile. I have seen pics that I recognize that clearly aren’t of the poster. I have a friend who has found other men using his dick pics as their own.
I understand Andrew’s search & need for a great sexy pic & how hard it can be to pose for one & have it look natural (if it’s a face pic). Body parts aren’t as difficult but even there one hits limits. Getting decent ass selfie requires a fair bit of agility. To maximize a cock pic the best angle requires another photographer. Or, in both cases, an elaborate set up of mirrors.
I have over the years learned how to take decent selfies in mirrors. One trick is to make sure you are in the frame, look into the mirror & then snap your pic. Same holds true for cell phones, at least for my flip phone. Though my best ‘action’ shot was taken by the other guy – it is hard to hold a camera & take a selfie while you body is caught up in …. ahem …other activities.
Andrew also talks about photos & body image. For years I hated pictures of myself – I didn’t realize how unflattering the angle used in many of them were & they was possible to photos, taken by others, where I looked okay. Underwear selfies made me even more comfortable with my body. I’ve see nudes of Andrew & let me tell you his body is photogenic even when he doesn’t have a hard-on.
Life of An Unknown Poet
I was handing my debit card
to the Winners clerk
to pay for some new undies
when my camera crew
got into shoving match
with her camera crew
I didn’t see how out of hand things were
till I watched a podcast of
The Making of The Life of An Unknown Poet
by the crew following my camera crew
my head camera man was asked
how did the poet feel
when he was accosted
he pointed his camera at me
as I walked out of the store
I looked back
glad I was still the one on camera
I was tempted to go back
but didn’t want to interrupt
the entertainment food chain
I had my own life to be filmed
and what he thought I thought
about the shoving match
wasn’t all that vital to me
the world knew how shallow I was
for a poet
except for this show
I remained unknown
even after six seasons
and this pissed me off
in fact my viewers
asked to see me pissing
but I had to draw the line somewhere
they could only watch me flush
I have some pride
later there was a news report
about the shoving match
someone was injured
not one of my crew or my crew’s crew
it struck me how futile it was
that no matter what one did
someone was bound to suffer
that even allowing my personal angst
and new undies
to be the fodder of millions
it didn’t stop the circle of suffering
the camera crew applauded me
as I wrote those lines about suffering
which made it all worth while once again
I can go living giving my all
even if there is no chance of sex
unless that camera man
from the clerk’s camera crew is available
he looked kind of hot
in the podcast of the shoving match
needs a shave
his bloody nose gave this unknown poet
every Tuesday
September or October (maybe) to be confirmed – feature – The Art Bar, Free Times Cafe
June – Capturing Fire 2019 – Washington D.C. (flight & hotel already booked) capfireslam.org
Hey! Now you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee in Washington at 2018’s capfireslam.org – sweet,eh? paypal.me/TOpoet