A quick look back before the peek – my TOpoet.ca following has crept up to 307 maybe I’ll get to 330 by the end of the year. Also the jump in WordPress hits has remained consistent many days with over 40 hits. I hope that remains once Google+ closes. India now keeps the lead in the number of hits, with US, Canada, Argentina, UK (!) rounding out the top five. Twitter is up to 213 followers thanks to more self-publishing entrepreneurs following me :-). Tumblr up 222 – even with their community standards I’m still getting hetero porn sites (‘Wet pussy waiting to date you’) trying to follow me.
Cold Dusters is moving along slowly but surely. Working though this second half I’m finding more spots where bridges have yet to be built, or where past events have to taken more into account i.e. Lillian dealing with her death notice. Some characters have been expanded. Not worrying about a paper publisher has let the story loosen up and expand in a much more natural way.
Speaking editing – for the Friday posts I’ve been including poems from way back in 2008. I have an endless back log of pieces that I haven’t looked at since I first spewed them out – so I can’t say they are new pieces but they are newly cleaned up of most typos – though I do aha etc some guessing as toy what I want when I, typing as fast as I could think, inout things like ‘f[erpqosjsdp[f gpdmf[ sdmf;’s’ 🙂 Actually not quite than radom but you get the picture.
The big event for March will be Hot Damn! It’s A Queer Slam with feature Inali Barger, at Buddies in Bad Times on Thursday, March 7. One more Toronto show in April will cap season 5 and send some Hot Damn! talent to Capturing Fire in Washington DC this June. Chances of my getting to Capturing Fire are slim this year, unless lotto max pays off. At least I don’t have to worry about travel health insurance in Canada.
The View From Here
I’ve looked at this from all sides
taken your view
my view
the outsiders’ view
the long short jaundiced
rear view
and it doesn’t matter which side
I’m the one in the wrong
even if it is your fault
that I’m in this position
it’s still my fault for looking twice
when the first glance
told me all I needed to know
I shouldn’t have taken a closer look
and let you pass me by
but what’s a man supposed to do
opportunities like you
don’t come my way everyday
not that this was my last chance
but it was as good a chance
as I’ve had in some time
a stroke of luck
and here I am
the guilty party once again
someone who said what he shouldn’t
at just the wrong time
for the greatest effect
those names we called each other
were only meant to hurt
I didn’t believe them for a minute
but you did
I’m not sensitive
one of my faults I know
cold heartless me
I’m too quick to react
when my buttons get pushed
I should never have showed you
where those buttons were
never let your tooth brush
in my bathroom
never let your socks under my bed
never say never again
it’s all my fault for making peace
for being the placater
I should have let go
when I first thad a chance
rather prove that by holding on
I was really really serious about us
I had lots of opportunities
to escape but I stayed
I should have defended myself
the second time
changed my view the third
but I didn’t
to make sure you realized I cared
that I could be forgiving
looking from all sides
inside outside top bottom head-to-toe
like I looked over you the first time
everything held the eye
I didn’t have enough eyes
to take it all in
no eye to the future
I knew it would come to no good
I would end up the heatless prick
once more
I had to see if this time would be different
you wouldn’t be like all the others
and you weren’t
trouble was I was like all the others
you told me that over and over
every man you meet treats you this way
I was no better than any of them
not as bad as some
but bad enough
and you know
for once
I’m glad you’re right
glad that over is over
trust me it’s over
I won’t take it lying down
standing up behind over backwards
or any which way
if that’s what it takes
to be true to you
I’d rather be a liar
because it doesn’t matter which side
view is from
I’m the one in the wrong
things will be different next time
every Tuesday 2019
June – Capturing Fire 2019 – Washington D.C. 
capfireslam.org
August 2-13: getting back to my roots in Cape Breton 
Hey! Now you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee on my trip to Cape Breton – sweet,eh? paypal.me/TOpoet
Hey! Or you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee in Washington at 2019’s capfireslam.org – sweet, eh? paypal.me/TOpoet
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