March 2019 Sneak Peek

A quick look back before the peek – my TOpoet.ca following has crept up to 307 maybe I’ll get to 330 by the end of the year. Also the jump in WordPress hits has remained consistent many days with over 40 hits. I hope that remains once Google+ closes. India now keeps the lead in the number of hits, with US, Canada, Argentina, UK (!) rounding out the top five. Twitter is up to 213 followers thanks to more self-publishing entrepreneurs following me :-). Tumblr up 222 – even with their community standards I’m still getting hetero porn sites (‘Wet pussy waiting to date you’) trying to follow me.

Cold Dusters is moving along slowly but surely. Working though this second half I’m finding more spots where bridges have yet to be built, or where past events have to taken more into account i.e. Lillian dealing with her death notice. Some characters have been expanded. Not worrying about a paper publisher has let the story loosen up and expand in a much more natural way.

Speaking editing – for the Friday posts I’ve been including poems from way back in 2008. I have an endless back log of pieces that I haven’t looked at since I first spewed them out – so I can’t say they are new pieces but they are newly cleaned up of most typos – though I do aha etc some guessing as toy what I want when I, typing as fast as I could think, inout things like ‘f[erpqosjsdp[f gpdmf[ sdmf;’s’ 🙂 Actually not quite than radom but you get the picture.

The big event for March will be Hot Damn! It’s A Queer Slam with feature Inali Barger, at Buddies in Bad Times on Thursday, March 7. One more Toronto show in April will cap season 5 and send some Hot Damn! talent to Capturing Fire in Washington DC this June. Chances of my getting to Capturing Fire are slim this year, unless lotto max pays off. At least I don’t have to worry about travel health insurance in Canada.

The View From Here

I’ve looked at this from all sides

taken your view

my view

the outsiders’ view

the long short jaundiced

rear view

and it doesn’t matter which side

I’m the one in the wrong

even if it is your fault

that I’m in this position

it’s still my fault for looking twice

when the first glance

told me all I needed to know

I shouldn’t have taken a closer look

and let you pass me by

but what’s a man supposed to do

opportunities like you

don’t come my way everyday

not that this was my last chance

but it was as good a chance

as I’ve had in some time

a stroke of luck

and here I am

the guilty party once again

someone who said what he shouldn’t

at just the wrong time

for the greatest effect

those names we called each other

were only meant to hurt

I didn’t believe them for a minute

but you did

I’m not sensitive

one of my faults I know

cold heartless me

I’m too quick to react

when my buttons get pushed

I should never have showed you

where those buttons were

never let your tooth brush

in my bathroom

never let your socks under my bed

never say never again

it’s all my fault for making peace

for being the placater

I should have let go

when I first thad a chance

rather prove that by holding on

I was really really serious about us

I had lots of opportunities

to escape but I stayed

I should have defended myself

the second time

changed my view the third

but I didn’t

to make sure you realized I cared

that I could be forgiving

looking from all sides

inside outside top bottom head-to-toe

like I looked over you the first time

everything held the eye

I didn’t have enough eyes

to take it all in

no eye to the future

I knew it would come to no good

I would end up the heatless prick

once more

I had to see if this time would be different

you wouldn’t be like all the others

and you weren’t

trouble was I was like all the others

you told me that over and over

every man you meet treats you this way

I was no better than any of them

not as bad as some

but bad enough

and you know

for once

I’m glad you’re right

glad that over is over

trust me it’s over

I won’t take it lying down

standing up behind over backwards

or any which way

if that’s what it takes

to be true to you

I’d rather be a liar

because it doesn’t matter which side

view is from

I’m the one in the wrong

things will be different next time

https://wp.me/P1RtxU-2f6

http://www.queerslam.com

every Tuesday 2019

June – Capturing Fire 2019 – Washington D.C. capfireslam.org

August 2-13: getting back to my roots in Cape Breton
Hey! Now you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee on my trip to Cape Breton – sweet,eh? paypal.me/TOpoet