It all started with someone posting a link to a video of Fred McKenna playing some songs. What he was playing was not that interesting but it opened up a memories of my Sydney childhood in Cape Breton. When my father relocated us in Sydney it was a one TV channel town (almost as bad as a one horse town) and that channel was CJCB – which is still on the air but is now part of CTV.
CJCB was essentially community TV with some shows imported from Halifax. One of which was Don Messer’s Jubilee out of Halifax. Jubilee (click Jubilee for link to video). To be honest I hated this show. I wanted real music i.e. radio top ten stuff. I don’t even recall if my parents enjoy the show but the minute it came on I dismayed. I must have watched it though because I remember the names of the singers – Marg Osburne & Charlie Chamberlain – who looked like a pair geriatrics. She was in her mid-30’s, he was in his 60’s. Fred McKenna was a frequent guest.
I also remember the Bupta Dancer who, thanks to Wikipedia, I now know were the Buchta Dancers – they did square dance crap. It was decades before I could tolerate the sound of country fiddle. But hearing Fred McKenna made me consider how this music influenced me, if at all. I did find one collection iTunes & downloaded all 32 minutes of it. Sweet but with almost no emotional resonance. The show’s intro music “Goin’ to the Barndance Tonight” isn’t included 😦
Part of why Jubilee didn’t impress me was that none of the singers or dancers had a shred of sex appeal. Black & white TV didn’t help much. Bulky boxy conservative clothes made the square dancers & singers seem even more square. The show lacked glamour or sparkle. I have vague memories of watching Liberace with my mother & being impressed by his glittery style. Jubilee had no visual style.
The music is pleasant, folky, sometimes Celtic with strong fiddle playing by Don Messer. The songs are uncomplicated folk, sea shanty & religious. Only one of the ones I’ve downloaded has much of an emotional resonance for me ‘Farewell To Nova Scotia.’ A farewell I’ve never regretted.
See Me?
people think they know me
they see me in my writing
they don’t see fiction
the fact that each confessed event
is reality
my reality
one that they can identify with
as my actually experience
in fact the closer I capture
something of their emotional life
the more they are sure
I have to have experienced it
they don’t want to believe
that each piece is a mask
not a piece of me
they see my photos
read bits of life that I process for display
and add it up into picture of me
they approach me with that
ah-ha
I see by your web page
that you are …
they don’t realize I am
as big a liar as they are
I may not talk in internet inches
but I don’t reveal anything out of turn either
that would be too painful
so like so many other’s
I adopt a mask of playful indifference
ironic poses to amuse
what they don’t see
I’m not going to hint it
trust me
no one has the entire picture
many don’t even have a glimpse
not that have hidden depth
there may be surprises
tucked away in many closets
I don’t see that something to confess
shoes shirts all get displayed
and even those things
that I explain aren’t me
the endless lists of almost lovers
sweet boyhood sexual discoveries
the bitter relationship breakups
all those fictions
I can make so real
are things that happen to people
but not always to me
I’m too shallow for most of that
safe in that distance
the pose that many writers seems to strike
knowing full well
that no one questions it
the fiction
is seen as a valid side of the writer
even if I deny the experience
it must be a part of who I am
of who you perceive me to be
the need to wear this disguise
reveals who I am
the mask one selects
is a reflection of the person
Romeo Harlequin Godzilla
one after the other put on
taken off
my face the mirror of yours
so what you see as me
isn’t me at all
but the you I squeeze into
when I sit down at the keyboard
to see though what I think is your mask
losing sense of self to that image
Hey! Now you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee on my next trip to Cape Breton – sweet,eh? paypal.me/TOpoet
TOpoet 