Everyone Has An Opinion
his opinion was
irrelevant to me
not that he was
in fact I enjoyed
spending time with him
until he commented
on an item in the news
the item was not relevant
to why were naked together
as he went on & on
I was at first amused
then dismayed
offered a more moderate
point of view
which goaded him even further
he was fun in bed
I choose to overlook his opinion
one I never asked for
& now that I knew it
there was no need to
know more about him
or his opinions
only when we might
get together again
which we did eventually
and when we did
it was good
until he launched
into an opinion
he spoke as one
who only listens
to those who agree with him
which I understand
why spend time
with people who argue with you
life is too short
I’m no one’s teacher
besides he knew what he knew
who was I to disagree
so
seeing him again
was no longer relevant
Sex & politics are often a bad mix. One of the traditions in 12 step recovery is that our opinions on outside issues are left outside of the room – the focus is on recovery not on who is running for x party. As in this piece, knowing too much about the other person can often change how we hear them. One things I’ve realized about myself is often I have no real opinions only smart-assed one-liners.
I don’t mind making chit-chat when I see a guy mind you but I stick to things like the weather, music, maybe TV shows we discover we both like – but I avoid politics, religion, etc. I can be judgemental when certain political, race, or even class options don’t coincide with mine. This guy, & this is a real experience, felt fine to spontaneously mouth off with his bigoted thoughts on both blacks & whites.
As I haven’t experienced the world as he has I didn’t argue but let him know I didn’t see some of these issues as he did. At least he wasn’t homophobic 🙂 The sex was great, but to be honest, that isn’t enough for me. Even in a FWB relationship I need some emotional &, I guess, philosophical connection. He on the other had felt that because I wasn’t argumentative that we were compatible enough for his needs.
I stopped putting energy into future get togethers. Made excuses a few times, caved a few times (solely because the sex was good). I succeeded in directing conversations away from his hobby-horses. But it was more work than I was willing to put inot what was supposed to be play. That was the focus of our getting together, not me learning tolerance & patience. So I stopped responding. Such is life.
The title is a reference to the phrase – “Opinions are like assholes. Everybody’s got one and everyone thinks everyone else’s stinks.”
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