please don’t hover
please go to another room
the need for appreciation
that is so apparent on your face
drains the moment of all pleasure
I can’t enjoy
what you want me to enjoy
while you are glaring at me
daring me not to enjoy it
just go away
let me eat in peace
let me find my satisfaction
on my own
because as long as you are so eager
I’ll keep my pleasure
I won’t let on if I like it or not
I know the power of the poker face
in the face of your anticipation
before you leave
please pass the salt
I love most competitive cooking shows. I’m amazed that these chefs can cook with cameras all around them, with close ups of their hands as they chop, close ups of their sweaty brows, of them slipping & falling, dodging around each other as they scramble for the ice-cream machine. I’m sure audition process includes some sort of screen-test. Cooking in your own kitchen with maybe the kids or the partner, or no one, watching is one thing, but in fronton cameras, lights, judges it must be quite stressful, to say the least.
The other side of the proposition is the judging, as the food is ultimately sampled by the panel under the expectant gazes of the chefs. I’ve learned phrases like: depth of flavour, unctuous, umami (I have no idea how it is spelled), caramelization, croquembouche. ‘Mmm these bacon & eggs have great depth of flavour.’
I don’t envy these judges, usually ‘celebrated’ chefs themselves, who have to render instant opinions – actually I don’t know how instant, as their savouring time is edited out & we rarely see how they come to their ultimate decisions. Chefs usually lose for technical issues (undercooked) or for lack of imagination. Rarely is there a blind tasting – where the judges don’t know whose food they are sampling.
The piece is also about approval seeking – on the TV level the chefs don’t take the judging that personally but on the ‘home front’ it’s little more awkward. ‘I made this just for you.’ or even worse ‘I bought this just for you. I saw it & knew you’d love it.’ Yikes – more than once I’ve been given something I never like but one has to grin & be grateful. It’s the thought that counts, right?