Distant Dust

Dust

when I turn to diamonds

will you wear me in your hair?

will you wear me on your fingers

or in your tiny ears

like stars in your black night?

fondled forever by many eyes

wondering who your diamonds were

before they became jewels for you

<>

When I turn to night

will you bring me daybreak?

will you bring me stars

or the moonlight

with its every-greedy movement

across your endless sky?

wondering where this night was

before it became the dawn

<>

when I turn to dust

will you blow me away?

will you gather me in your hands

or in a crystal box?

with your smiles the seal

and its sides your tears?

as you wonder who I was

to turn to dust for you

<>

I ask, for you see,

I too shall become

dust fragile

night invisible

diamond transparent

and I have to know

before I turn

before I turn

before I turn to you

Oct/70

Beware the love-lorn fool who knows how to use language to over-state his case 🙂 This piece is entirely an exercise in language not one about an actual person or experience. I get a rather middle-eastern vibe from it now – maybe the influence of Kahlil Gilbran – who wrote about love in similar  lofty, selfless, intellectual language. It makes me think of young girls who want to kiss some idol without it going further than that.

Today I am struck by the lack of sexuality, of lust, of carnality in this piece. Why was I reluctant to be explicit? Partly out of a sense of shame. The purer the emotional the more ethical, the more spiritual it is. To admit physical longing was base & not spiritual at all.

I am amused by the ‘fragility’ of it after the rough ‘rrr’s of Woodsman :-). It has a very pop song structure with images leading to the wrap up in the final verse. I was/am fond of theme & variation when I write poetry. I also enjoy patterned structure that isn’t rhyme or meter but image construct & repeated words ‘when I turn to’ ‘will you’ ‘wonder/wondering’. A structure that ties the verses together.

A structure that ends with that last verse. By which the reader doesn’t know of the object of affection even knows it is an object of affection. That unattainable object of desire that only exists in the mind of the poet. The ending is ambiguous – is the poet transforming into the object or finally ready to confront the object of desire. Or are both dust on the mirror that keeps the reader from seeing themselves 🙂

I do have a limited number of the original Distant Music chapbook for sale for $25.00 each (includes surface mail postage). Send via the paypal above along with where to send it.

paypal.me/TOpoet 

“hear my whisper in your heart.”

Even with a chill in the air Cabaret Noir pulled in a full house. A great line-up of open stagers taught us that you don’t play cards with Jesus & that Marilyn Monroe’s death resonated all the way to Russia. I wish open stagers would learn to print their pieces large enough to read – holding the text between your face and the microphone muffles everything read. I did hit the stage with another Pinebow sneak peek.

scarf Philip dropped his come pashima

Philip Cairns (www.philipcairns.com) fresh from the launch of his diamond encrusted chapbook Elizabeth Taylor’s Jewels did a great set of all new material. A sequel, of sorts, to his Bedbug Blues, became a bedbug blue movie. An affectionate bio-poem about Jayne Mansfield name checked her many films (but missed her singing career) – it was her wig not her head that was lost in that tragic accident. Then he tapped into his dark side with Blood Lust ‘the snap of a collar bone.’

I missed his last piece because of chatter – friends of the music feature felt fine talking all the way though his set & getting louder as he got louder to be heard (then were silent when their idol was on). Plus people coming up to the bar to pay their tabs shouted over Philip as they paid their bill.

shoeblack Philip dropped his shoe running from the police

First music feature Shikha Sehgal (www.shikhamusic.com) drew us into her songs with her simple & direct stage presence. Accompanying herself on an electric uke her songs were bluesy evocations of romantic longing and loss. Delicate, spare and sweet with carefully controlled yet emotional vocals – sensuous like a fine silver wire yet strong as steel – her music pulled us into her web.  We were willing to “hear my whisper in your heart.”

emerald

Philip dropped his 31306.75 carat aquamarine 

Sadly I didn’t get to hear Cappy & Kev. It didn’t look like they’d get to the stage much before 10 & I like to be home by 10. Next time.

some pics: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.364186547073526.1073741839.145297655629084&type=3&uploaded=24

 

samples

 

Kept In The Loop

 

when I said

I’d meet you at 7

I meant

if I had nothing else to do

something else came up

I didn’t have time

to get in touch

it won’t happen again

how could it

unless something else comes up

I promise I’ll never let you down

I’ve never let you down in the past

well

at least not like that

and that was your own fault

yes I did say I’d be there

but I didn’t know

what you were asking

I had other things on my mind

at the time

I am not seeing someone else

there is only you

at least

at that time there was only you

but you knew that

I told you about the other guy

I’ve never kept that from you

you can’t say I deceived you

I always kept you in the loop

most of the time anyway

bballs03 blue balls, not Philip’s

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