Kitchen Kitch

Over the basement door & the door to the dining-room I these two pairs of plaster ‘ornaments’ that I bought in the early 2000’s at a street sale on my street. This was an annual event early in July – will it happen this year? I doubt it as interest in it has declined over the years to the point where only a few house drag stuff out. At one time it was almost a real flea-market with tables of brass, dvd’s, & the like.

I did have stuff, back in the day, & sold off lots of lps, useless nick-knacks, even books. With so much covid purging the past few months I’ve seen possible street sale stuff dragged to the curb to take away or trash so I doubt if there’ll much even if there is a street sale.

Any way I bought these, now of dubious political-correctness, orientalist hangings. Hand-painted, with a couple of chips, there when purchased. Very 50’s, early 60’s feel to them that I love. the perfect size for over a doorway. I resisted a set of grapes & also a set of daises. They lacked the true kitch these have.

By the basement door is this poster on a board. It was an unexpected bonus when I bought the newly-released, expanded, collectors’ edition of The Return of The King at Sam’s or maybe it was HMV. I had picked it pop for my partner who was is TGH at the time for heart issues. As it was unexpected I had to cart it there & then home on the subway.

By the window is my orange tree (now outside for the summer). It was started from a seed that had sprouted in the orange. I planted it & it actually grew. Full spectrum grow light over it. Beside it, against the wall, is ‘Sober-Up.’ Enamelled metal, 30’s style advertising – that maybe be for a real product. It was part of a friend’s estate – when he passed I got to chose a few items & this seemed like a clear choice.

Finally another yard-sale purchase – an egg chicken. Every kitchen needs a chicken. You life the top off & store eggs in the body. I’ve never used it to store anything mind you but I love it. Hand painted with a bit of a 30’s retro about it at the same time. I doubt if it is a period piece though. I also doubt if people keep eggs outside of the fridge either. 

Aphrodisiac

I know you’re sore

after that gal you’d been hitting on

walked out on you 

after three drinks

how the last two chicks you dated

dumped you via text message

one of them still won’t return your calls

how they turn into such selfish bitches

but just because I’m a clean old queer

doesn’t mean I have any interest 

in your macho macho meat

the fact that you’re straight 

just ain’t my aphrodisiac

<>

you may think I’m one of those 

predatory homos you are sure 

are always lurking around

hungry for any straight guy 

to fall into my eager mouth

well honey 

you are in a dream world

the fact that I checked out our jeans

was because 

I was wondering where you got them

<>

you know in this light 

you are sort of cute

and kind of sweetly drunk

but I’m not drunk enough

so why don’t you find your buds 

you aren’t getting anything here

‘cause if them nasty hos

you always seem to end up with

aren’t interested I’m certainly not

the fact that you’re straight 

just ain’t my aphrodisiac mac

I do have a limited number of the original Distant Music chapbook for sale for $25.00 each (includes surface mail postage). Send via the paypal above along with where to send it.

paypal.me/TOpoet 

A Christmas LivingRoom

One Christmas Day decades ago on my morning walk I found this baby sock on the sidewalk. I couldn’t resist it & brought it home. I hung it on the fireplace screen as a Xmas stocking for the baby Jesus. The glass bell beside it is a more recent addition. I stole it at a White Elephant gift exchange a few years ago. For those unfamiliar with that game part of it is the taking of gifts from one another.

In one corner of the living-room is a dvd cabinet that gets a seasonal make over. The festive ‘cloth’ is actually plastic, which is why the creases have never folded out of it. The embroidery is real but done by a machine & the ‘lace’ is laser cut. It was another White Elephant steal. 

On top of it are a couple of kitch but not seasonal items that only come out for the season. The praying hands are done in a delightful lime green flocking. They were a recovery anniversary gift over 30 years ago. They were a re-gifting from a friend who got them from someone who had picked them up on a visit to Las Vegas where else). My friend was a little insulted by them here as I was delighted & had them on display for years than decided they were best as a tonal feature.

The 3D picture is a take on classic protective angel hovering over children. This was a very popular Victorian trope of which I seen many representations from oils, prints, jigsaw puzzles & even embroideries. I bought it unframed a yard sale. 3D pictures are always kitch no matter how artful they maybe – this one is merely depth – the faces don’t flicker between pretty & skeletal or demonic 😦 I have it for many years as well & am always happy to take it out of hiding so the protective angel can hover over us all.

This final, for this post, picture goes back to 1981 – our first year in this house. You can see the actual mantle piece & the fireplace at work. That’s me pouring over some book that I almost remember but I do recognize the bookmark as a postcard of a Cocteau drawing. We still have that tinsel garland.

https://wp.me/P1RtxU-2f6

January

Thursday 23 – Hot Damn! It’s Queer Slam – Buddies and Bad Times Theatre

March
March 5 – Hot Damn! It’s Queer Slam – Buddies and Bad Times Theatre

April
April 3 – Hot Damn! It’s Queer Slam – Season 6 finales Buddies and Bad Times Theatre

May

Richard III – Stratford Festival

June  – Capturing Fire 2020 – Washington D.C.  capfireslam.org 

July

All’s Well That Ends Well – Stratford Festival

Hey! Or you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy coffee in Washington at 2020’s capfireslam.org – sweet, eh? paypal.me/TOpoet

Christmas in My Bathroom

For December I’ll be sharing Christmas memories that I’ve stored away as ornaments over the decades. Up first is this busy creche scene than has grown over the years. The oldest piece is the stained glass star that my partner made before we met – so it goes back at least 45 years. No, now that I look closely, the oldest are the Red Rose Tea ceramic figurines from my childhood in Cape Breton.

The creche was a gift at our first Christmas party way back in the early 80’s – I love the simplicity of it – though over the years the setting has become less simple 🙂 It always reminds me of my friend Frank (downed by AIDS neglect) who gave it to me. The Pope, with solar waving hand, was a gift, as were the Jesus & E.A. Poe action figures the other side of the Archway. The Jesus beside the Pope was found in the street, as was the Statue of Liberty, & the colourful ‘village’ people, including the skier on top of the Archway.

The Archway was another gift one Christmas, its also a digital clock but no one had figured out how to set the time. The ‘jewels’ are actually napkin rings but I felt they did more good here than on a table. The camel is from my friend Kyle’s childhood creche array. The turtles – not sure from where actually. I may have picked up the shell turtle on my travels.

The colourful ‘village’ people are this year’s additions. I found a bowl of them at the curb & plucked out the ones that weren’t too badly broken. They fit in perfectly. Another last minute addition is the Born This Way wrist band that is so appropriate for the Virgin birth – Jesus didn’t ask to be saviour but he was born that way.

Hey! Now you can give me $$$ to defray blog fees & buy more Christmas kitch– sweet,eh? paypal.me/TOpoet