Don’t Take My Time

My Time

I am a creature of routine

no matter how hot the guy

I am unavailable at certain times

often the only time they are free

which they take personally

even though all we know

about each other are profile pics

& what we claim are our likes

 

they act as if my time boundary

is playing hard to get

or just playing them

a sign I’m not really interested

that all I want is their desire

not their bodies

one guy said ‘if you’re going to be that way

good luck because you’ll need it’

as if my schedule 

was a character fault

 

one called me inflexible

though I had suggested other times

other days

his inflexibility was of no concern to him

whereas mine was arbitrary

whatever 

I have a life

I don’t set it aside for no dick

 

or perhaps they see it

as control

that I am making it clear

I am the dominant, the top,

not some submissive bottom bitch

gasping eager for their randy visit

 

even if I am eager

it’s still my time

I have an acquaintance in recovery who will phone & launch into their conversation. No hello, no is this a good time, no how are you. I will stop them asap if I’m busy but they’ve never learned to say – is this a good time. I have another friend in recovery who calls & really needs to meet facto face for a real talk. I suggest times – none of which fit his schedule – he assumes that for the sake off recovery I’ll change my schedule to suit his needs. I’ve done this a few times only to have him text to say he’d be late or etc.

What does this have to do with ‘My Time’ – recovery has taught me to respect my own needs, to respect my boundaries & not to let people-pleasing turning into martyrdom. Times I’ve been persuaded to make allowances for another’s time constraints have rarely worked well for either party.

Sticking to my guns often has people acting as if my not being inconvenienced by them is an inconvenience to them. That also might have to do with he fact that I don’t apologize, any more, or explain either, when I say ‘not free at that time.’ Odd how being firm can be seen as arrogant or indifferent.

I no longer take the bait of being guilted into being agreeable. I’d rather be seen as unreasonable than being seen as an ‘any time Chuck.’ Now in the age of covid distancing such inflexibility is even more necessary & a covid ‘no’ is acceptable to many. Even if I am eager, now, it’s still my life.


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Give Generously

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Another of the 48 Laws of Power by Robert Green as a writing prompt.

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Law 43: Work on the Heart and Mind of Others

you can make a difference

in the lives of these children

dogs  endangered species  bees

ice shelf

you can make a difference

the overfishing of the sea

the destruction of the rain forest

the testing of make up on animals

only you can help

we know you want to

if only to stop

seeing these high definition

close ups of tears on cheeks

skin taut over fragile bones

acres of swamps

replaced with sugar cane fields

birds slicked with oil

babies

look it’s babies

for fuck sake

innocent little kittens

going hungry

so skinny

even the human babies

starving won’t eat them

only you can help

these photographers need work

these administrators need

your funds to administrate

we don’t want you to rescue anyone

we have skilled professionals

who studied in universities

to learn how to teach these unfortunates

what they need to change

to become suitable candidates for rescue

that education doesn’t come for free

you won’t have to touch anything

other than key pad in a donation

only you can help

only you

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Politics of Promises

Another of the 48 Laws of Power by Robert Green as a writing prompts. The plan is to post one of these Law prompted pieces a week on Thursdays. I wrote this a month or so ago bur seems fitting with the political hot air coming out of the USA these days 🙂

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Law 9: Win Through Your Actions – Not Argument

a lot was said

enough to sway the people

get some of them out to the polls

of course

it will turn out

you were misunderstood

that what you promised

wasn’t exactly what you could do

that due to conditions

beyond your control

you were stuck with things as they are

not as you promised to change them

you weren’t lying

just to get elected

 

you were simply uninformed

unaware

that the obstacles to be overcome

couldn’t be overcome

with words

with language

with the slippery tongue of future

that you used to unlock the door of success

that you wish you could do

what you planned

really you mean to do it

honestly

it’s not your fault

 

you can’t move the mountains

you promised to move

we really didn’t expect you

to fix what was broken by others

you certainly didn’t break anything

it was so broken

when you got there

you had no choice

but to make the best of a bad situation

and if we don’t like it

we better shut the fuck up

 

or

you’ll silence us

the same way

others who have been elected

have silenced us

the victory you promised we’d have

isn’t relevant now

that you have power invested in you

you’ll do that you think best

which will be better

than what you promised

we just have to give you a break

give you chance

and stop nagging you

with evidence of your lies

we mean

of your promises

they are taken out of context anyway

so we better give you one more chance

to do what you promised

or it’ll be our fault

for lacking patience and foresight

and forgiveness

why are we so bitter

so cruel

you meant well

and that’s enough

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