Look At Me

Look At Me

does this fit

does it look good on me

do I look sane in it

does it turn you on

do I look educated in this

does it suit the occasion

will it get me laid

can it open doors for me

will it need to be ironed

can I wear it in public

will it turn heads

does it make me look old

look desperate 

does it come in other colours

maybe a size larger

does it make up for my lack of style

do I have the guts to wear it

does it wear me

will it last longer than a glance

is it why you want me

am I anything without it

can it be replaced
can it replace me

excuse me 

while I slip into 

something a little less demanding

I loved ‘What Not To Wear’ & the stylists philosophical/psychological stance on the value of dressing in ways that enhance our self-esteem. But it is easy to mistake appearance for self & count on clothes take the place of the person. When I was featuring or doing an open stage I dressed as if I meant to be there & I know the power of the right shirt & the right pair of shoes. But also know the right shirt will not make a bad poem better.

This piece is a list poem – some items are our expectations of what we expect from appearance – how clothing can curate people’s perceptions of us. I’ve seen articles on power-suits, dress for success, jeans that will change your sex life. Yahoo is full of headlines like ’60 year old looks ultra glamorous in …’ ‘XX wears daring string thong to gala’ ‘Who are you wearing’ has taken the place of ‘How did it feel to be nominated’

An actor friend of mine said that they never really captured a character until they found the right shoes. I understood that. I also know people who dress defensively to deliberately put people off rather than inviting them in – one moaned about always attracting creeps but when suggested the way they dressed was doing exactly that I was told not to be so superficial.

I’ve always been amused how people who reject ‘lookism’ end up looking alike. Sometimes wearing clothes that say ‘don’t judge me by how I look’ & who judge others by how they look.I always wants that Taxi Driver scene: ‘are you looking at me’ to end up with DeNiro snarling ‘do these jeans make me look psychotic?’ 


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Replace Me

samprules2

Working through the  227 Rules For Monks.

Who knew the simple life could be so complex.

Replace Me

excuse me 

while I slip into something 

more comfortable

does this fit

does it look good on me

do I look sane in it

does it turn you on

do I look educated in this

does it suit the occasion

will it get me laid

can it open doors for me

will it need to be ironed

can I wear it in public

will it turn heads

does it make me look old

look desperate 

it comes in other colours

maybe a size larger

can it be replaced

can it replace me

does it make up for my lack of style

do I have the guts to wear it

does it wear me

will it last longer than a glance

is it why you want me

am I anything without it

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Bigger Better

Every Man Wants

when I said

I’d had enough

I meant I needed no more

not wanting more

isn’t a sign 

that I don’t like what you offer

so don’t take it personally

no I’m not trying to lose weight

why

do you think I’m fat

or that I’m afraid of putting

the pounds on

I’m happy with the way I look

 

sure

like everyone I know

I’d like to loose five pounds

okay maybe ten

when I look in the mirror

I like what I see

I’m content with my body

yeah sure

I’d like a six pack

every man wants a bigger dick

but you know

what I have is what I have

no one has complained

 

so no

I don’t need any more

no matter how tempting 

I may want it

but no thanks

there are others more hungry 

who need another helping

all I need

is to enjoy the empty plate

The threat of covid19 resulted in panic buying that exposed, to me, our cultural addiction to materialism. I’ve written pieces about this compulsion for more – one of the things the 227 Rules underlines is the freedom that comes from letting go of the need for things. The Rules around clothing are a way out of fashion, out of being defined by appearances – though the monk’s robes in & of themselves define wearer as a monks.

Some of this is based on actual experience. When I order a burger in a restaurant I say ‘no bun.’ More than once I’ve had the server say or ask if I’m cutting back on carbs or am trying to loose weight. I usually say yes to whatever they propose. Yes is faster than explaining what is none of their fucking business. Some places will offer tomato slices or extra fries for the bun. Whatever. I find the buns to be bloating & usually tasteless, so why bother?

 

Much of materialism is based on lookism – often unrealistic body types. At one time nearly everyone I knew was on a diet, involved in a fitness routine – more to attract the right partner than to be healthy. In fact it wasn’t enough to be healthy – it had to be more. Being content with one’s looks was self-indulgence or worse – self-loathing.

 

My personal fitness regime is geared to keep me healthy. I want to live long & in good health. I dress for comfort most of the time, but I do know how to dress for appeal too & don’t mind doing that. I eat sensibly, cut out a lot of empty-calorie junk, take my vitamins. The main vanity I indulge in is good moisturizers & of course sunblock in summer. No one has complained 🙂
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I Can’t Get No 

samprules2

Working through the  227 Rules For Monks.

Who knew the simple life could be so complex.

Satisfaction 

it went exactly as planned

the only one disappointed

was me

I wanted things to be better

the story of my life

 

the right size is never right enough

a good fit isn’t adequate

the praise adulation 

are mere stop gaps

diversions

from going beyond expectations

 

good enough

feels like settling for less

it isn’t satisfying to measure up

it has to be unforgettable

sure your good enough is fine by me

but my good enough

isn’t worth bothering with

even when I am the only one disappointed


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