In September 2020 Philip Cairns asked me to write an introduction to Hollywood Poems – a collection of his writing. He sent me an advance reading copy & here is what I wrote:
“Philip’s Disney sweetheart was Annette Funicello, mine was Haley Mills. He exalts in Anita Ekbert, I was enthralled by Brigette Bardot. You might ask – what’s with gay guys & obscure female film stars? In his Hollywood Poems Philip explores that question in a series of tender odes which reveal as much about him as it does about the objects of his fandom. The Bedbug Blues pieces are funny & bitingly true.
The poems are like quilts stitched together with contrasting swatches of the fabric of his life, patterns get repeated, images emerge & a person appears. They are like meeting up with a chatty friend who tells charming stories with tangents that sometimes connect to each other but always connect to life. The style is Frank O’Hara meets Walt Whitman – amiable, comfortable, inviting & emotionally resonant.”
I met Philip way back in 1990 when he was cast in Bushwack Theatre’s production of T-Shirts. One of his lines, that I still remember, was ‘I was never a cute kid.’ Which really summed up the way many gay men felt about themselves. He delivered it with sincerity. He became a valuable member of the Bushwack company of performers, & was featured in many of its productions over the nine years that the company lasted.
After Bushwack ended we sort of lost touch for several years. I retuned to full force to my own writing & became involved in the Toronto spoken-word world, in which the out gay male perspective was seriously under-represented. I encouraged Philip to hit some of the many open stages. He found them somewhat homophobic but persisted.
Eventually he, along with myself, Lizzie Violet & others formed The Beautiful and Damned collective which ran a monthly performance series for two years at various venues. We rotated hosting, lined up features & musicians. It was great fun while it lasted.
I heard many of the pieces in Hollywood Poems when they were first performed at various readings, when of course, one could go to readings. You can get the book on Amazon. Check out his web page.
HOLLYWOOD POEMS , www.philipcairns.com
For more about him, The Beautiful and Damned, & Lizzie Violet take a search stroll through the TOpoet archives.
from may 2008
Ready
the ignored alarm
the heeded bladder
the rotation of cereals
kiwi a radical change
strawberries
blueberries grapes bananas
different yet consistent
rotation from what is there
to what is there now
the ritual with water
the seasonal changes of view
but still the same view
the email check
the rotation of shoes undies
the clack of spoons
ring of phones
expected voices
expected scatter of opportunities
land in the same places
different days
yet the same days
this on the first Friday
this on the second Monday
a trusted structure
to give balance to the routine
never identical
but always the same
does it need variation
can the little books be left out one day
consistency and variation
brief departures
make routine so welcome
enjoy more and more
what doesn’t happen every day
if it did
pleasure would be gone
opportunity isn’t the aphrodisiac
or is it
time memory fluctuations
flow
picture of the innocent lie
the flavour of oranges
the melt of chocolate
the squirm of recognition
the long to muss hair
how can the hands keep reaching
each morning out of the bed
follow the slopes of the day
that rolls back to the same bed
to the same sleeping moments
dreams lost to bladder
secure consistent
ready to ignore the alarm

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